I think I may have permanently endangered a friendship when I called this hooker and asked him to come to the youth barbecue with me. The woman who is in charge of it is terrified that no one is going to show up, and I'm actually quite worried that she's right. Desperate phone calls being made to five or six people on my part, hoping against hope that someone is home, and no one is.
Nobody but Hooker von SlutSlut, who vehemently told me in so many words that he would rather eat pine cones and hedgehogs with a spork.